He would woke up each morning with the desire
to do right, to be a good and meaningful person, to be, as simple as it sounded
and as impossible as it actually was, happy. By early afternoon he was overcome
by the feeling that nothing was right, or nothing was going right for him, by
the desire to be alone. By evening he was fulfilled: alone in the magnitude of
his grief, alone in his aimless guilt, alone even in his loneliness. I am not sad;
he would repeat to himself over and over, I am not sad. As if he might one day
convince himself. Or fool himself. Or convince others--the only thing worse
than being sad is for others to know that you are sad. Because his life had
unlimited potential for happiness, fall asleep with his heart in his empty
white room, that was no part of him at all. And each morning he would wake with
it again, having become a little heavier, a little weaker, but still pumping. .
.
Every day when he gets
back from his college, he finds himself alone only with his solitude by his
side, he feels lonely. He feels miserable; he would curse himself, his fate
over and over. He would curse people around him for whatsoever reason. Always he
has the urge to call her and ask her, how is she doing? Is she missing him the
same way as he does? But he can’t, he has to stop himself and console himself,
he explains this to his heart, “dude u
have to be practical, a bit selfish too coz to survive in this materialistic
world u have to become one of those...” And there goes a long fight between
the evil inside him and the angel inside his heart... and then he closes his
eyes and let himself drown in the arms of deep slumber, he feels good in his
own world of fantasy... detached from the whole world, from all emotions, from
all relations it’s just him there... and when he wakes up, again the cruel
reality slaps him yet again and shows him that life isn’t a dream where
everything will happen according to our choice, life is something else. In
simple words, if you make it simple its simpler for you, if you make it
complicated its complicated for you...
People don’t understand one thing, which is a universal fact
that someday sooner or later people are meant to leave us. We have to accept it
the way it comes doesn’t matter what the situation was, how true your love was
or how great friends you were? It’s the same in every case. When we go through
a rough phase we keep on thinking about anything and everything in the most
negative way possible. Hence we keep on attracting negative energy which is
always present around us and make our life miserable. It’s true that if such things
happen definitely we will be sad. But why do people ends up in depression? Why do
they start smoking or boozing? Why do they think that they are the only one
suffering? And why the hell they detach themselves from all emotions and
relations of this world, let alone with their solitude.
Life moves on, doesn’t matter how rough is the
situation one day there has to be dawn if there is night. Same way we should
learn to move on, come out of the misconception that in a whole lifetime only
once we can fall in love. I contradict this; you can fall as many times as you
want. And people who tag you as emotionless or easy going let them do that, coz
people who can’t move on in their life can’t do anything worthwhile. Life is
all about moving on treasure the memories of your past and keep on moving till
the time you are freed from this universe. One has to accept few things the way
it comes. You can’t force people to be with you forever, everyone has a certain
time limit in your life, they will stay till that time comes and then they will
leave you on your own. Instead of brooding over it, make that time worthwhile
for each and every person who is there in your life. And then see how your life
will bloom.
No one is good and no one is bad, it’s the situations
which sometimes turn them into an angel and sometimes into an evil. It’s not
only you who has problem; there are over 7 billion people all over the world
with 7 billion different fates. And each one of them has some issues with life.
Nothing is perfect, if it was then there was no need of God or the power which
balances the whole system the whole universe. Obstacles are a part of life,
they teach us at every point of time. Whenever we face something out of the box
then that means there is a need of learning something which we are actually
lacking. And that’s how one gains experience, few takes it in a good spirit and
use that negative energy to do wonders in life. And few use that negative energy
to make their life more miserable. This whole universe works on the logic of
law of attraction. There are both positive and negative energies around you,
negative energies are more influential and it attracts you more compared to the
positive energy. Its upto you whether you want to get influenced by it or not. Sooner
or later everyone does or everyone has to that’s the law of nature but who
comes out of it matters the most.
"Life tests you to the core and in those
battles you win some, you lose some."
